In one of my previous posts, I did mentioned, i want to get married... but that does not mean i say I am ready for marriage! Please, don't get me wrong... of course i want to get married yeah, because I want someone to always be there with me.. like they always call it, the better half.. I wonder if anyone who don't have the desire to get married at this age..
However, even if, just if, my crush send a proposal to me or my family, wanting to take me as his wife, until today, i would have to reject! I am not ready. Yes, I want to, but I am not ready to enter that responsibility world. I am not responsible enough to my own self! I am not ready for marriage unless I am totally responsible for myself first. If I can take care of my self financially, physically, emotionally, then I am ready for marriage.Marriage is ibadah.. it is not for me to get married just to satisfy my desire.. it is supposed to be for Allah! it is an Ibadah! my intention should be for Allah, and of course, I need to make sure to do my Ibadah with so much care! I am not yet ready. so many things that I need to be prepared to go through that world..
I once traveled with some guys.( InsyaAllah I will avoid doing that again..but I've learned so much) I know that guys are just like a big baby.. I need to be prepared for that! if I can't even organize my own self, how do I take care of that big baby? I mean, seriously.( Guys, no offense.. ). Anyhow, I must make sure I can handle and take care of those who are around me first before even think of getting married.. Honestly, I am not ready, until people around me could tell me if I am ready. I am not even a responsible child to my parents yet :(
I know, most scholars are asking and trying to encourage young people to get married.. Most young people are getting excited with this phenomena. But still, getting mature before getting married should be in the list!. I am totally agree that young people need to get married as soon as possible obviously to avoid those coupling, dating, and for sure, fornication. these sins are getting popular nowadays and should be overcome effectively.. how? get married! but before that, be MATURE!
People are over excited to get married that they skipped the steps before getting married. here is the list.
1. Be mature
2. be responsible
3. get married
(of course,, with other obligations as well. learn.practice, teach)
Come on people... getting married early means getting mature and be responsible EARLY! how?learn for those sahabi( the companions of the prophet) like Zaid ibnu Harithah, Arqam ibnu Abu Al-Arqam, Talhah ibn Ubaydillah... and many more..
they became so responsible even at age of teens and around that.. They are willing to take care of the name of Islam because of how mature they are, they are ready to take the responsibility. What about us? even the school assignments, we can't manage. We are more interested in those movies, technologies that drive us no where.
*sighs*
conclusion : yes, I want to get married but in deeper meaning, I need to get mature and be responsible as soon as possible. Marriage is not to divorce. No one wants it that way.. so then, I need to make sure I get prepared first, before taking any step in.
Marriage is not for kids to have fun and when a problem comes, they get divorce.It is for a man and a woman to get together with the purpose of meet the ultimate goal, Allah's pleasure. It is a serious matter and not at all, a fairy tale like they try to prove. Thus, I am not ready until no one should tell me I need to do my homework, clean my room and call my parents. That time, I know exactly what to do.
Self-sufficient but to Allah
sounds childish, but that is the reality.
Wallahu ta'ala 'alam.. may Allah guide us all.. amiin
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